How do you ask for her/his parents' blessing?
22/08/2024 09:00 | Engagement
Is it time for the next step in your relationship, and do you want to ask your friend to marry you? It happens less and less, but asking the parents' blessing is still a beautiful tradition. But how do you ask, without clammy hands, for her/his parents' permission to marry?
Photo (above): Magic Flash Photo
1. Talk to your friend first
It may sound strange, but talk to your friend first. Does she/he also want to get married? Is she/he ready at the moment? It would be painful if your father-in-law says 'yes', but your friend(s) says 'no'... If you know she/he is the one, there is no harm in practising the most important question of your life beforehand. Traditionally, you ask her/his hand to the father of the bride(groom), but it's best to check with your friend if she/he is also into this tradition.
However, if you want the proposal to be a complete surprise for your partner too, skip this step, but still try to find out in a subtle way what your partner thinks about this tradition. Dis, for example, a story of a so-called colleague who asked his in-laws' blessing and pay close attention to how she/he reacts.
2. Ask quietly in private
Ask the parents' blessing in a respectful, quiet manner. Take your time with it and meet with her/his parents separately so they know this is about something important. Keep the event private; asking the question quickly in between at the annual Christmas party is not a good idea. Show that you are serious about their daughter/son and that she/he is in good hands, this will reassure them. You love her/him, so also show this to the people who made her/him the way she/he is... Especially the father-in-law will appreciate this. Stand straight and explain why marriage would make you the happiest person in the world.
3. The blessing itself
Casual conversation is always nice, but don't forget the most important thing: the blessing itself. Ask for her/his hand in your way, without rehearsed phrases or clichés. These days, it doesn't hurt to also ask for her/his mother's blessing, but this is definitely not a must. The important thing is that you ask the question in a way you feel comfortable with! Those nerves? They will disappear when you get a resounding 'yes' ...
Read more on this topic at this link...