Your best man or maid of honor is someone you know through and through, and who you would prefer to have at your side all day on your wedding day. But what if several people qualify... how do you make the best choice? There is no rule of etiquette on how best to choose your best man or maid of honor, but these 4 tips will go a long way.
Photo (top) by Yves Schepers
Let your heart speak
Suppose you were not the best man or maid of honor at your friend's wedding, but you are now closer to him/her than you were then... Wouldn't it make more sense to choose this friend as best man or maid of honor than the friend you were best man or maid of honor to, but are not as close to? Is that fair to the friend who was your best man or maid of honor? And what about your sister/brother? Because, in a way, she/he expects to be chosen. And what if you have more than one sister/brother?
Well... The people who will be by your side on your wedding day should not be the result of a simple addition. Switch off your mind and let your heart speak. Your best man or maid of honor should be someone you can't imagine not being there, on your big day and for the rest of your life. Someone you feel very close to and who supports you through and through. Your best man or maid of honor is also someone who knows exactly when to tell you what you want to hear, and when to be dead honest...
Family is your wild card
There is no rule that you should choose family over friends. However, if you choose your family as your best man or maid of honor, for example your sister/brother over a friend, you can avoid a drama between two jealous friends. Simply because it is generally accepted that family takes precedence over friendship. Because family is and remains family.
You can choose more than one best man or maid of honor
According to Belgian law, you are not actually obliged to appoint a best man or maid of honor. No more stress about choosing! If you can't choose, you can also have more than one best man or maid of honor. Per couple you can choose 'none', one, two, three or a maximum of four best men or maid of honors. So the groom could choose one best man and you could choose three. You could also, for instance, choose two best men or bridesmaids for the legal wedding and another two for the church ceremony. Make sure that you involve your chosen people equally in the preparations for your wedding day, so that they all feel equally valued.