Photo (above): Ceremony speaker (left): Quinta Essentia - Photographer: Roxanne Danckers Photography / Jewellery: Hanne Detail - Photographer: Elien Van den Brande
Photographs of your deceased loved ones
Photographs are often the first way in which deceased loved ones are remembered and present during a wedding. Place a photograph of each missed loved one on a small table, with some flowers and candles.
Place a handwritten card next to it - one addressed to each of them. Or hang a few photos (and possibly non-flammable candles) in a tree outside in the garden. In a central location or subtly present - it will offer you comfort and make you feel that your deceased loved ones are indeed present on your most beautiful day.
Lights keep the memory alive
A candle or light also symbolises the love you cherished for your deceased loved ones, and the attention you wish to give them on your wedding day. You can include their name or photo, but you don't have to. Ultimately, you know who that light is burning for. A glowing candle flame keeps the memory of your loved one alive.
Carry something personal with you
Keep your deceased loved ones even closer to you by wearing a personal item of theirs at your wedding. As a bride, you could wear your mother's or grandmother's wedding dress or veil, or have it altered, or wear her jewellery. Or keep her prettiest handkerchief in your clutch bag – to wipe away that little tear during an emotional speech. As the groom, you could consider wearing a pair of your father's or grandfather's favourite cufflinks, or cherish that little photo in your inside pocket.
Music for deceased loved ones
- Music evokes so much feeling and emotion... A familiar tune or melody touches you in the depths of your subconscious — the notes go straight to your heart and soul. Play the favourite song of (you and) your deceased loved ones at your wedding, dedicate a dance to them, or include a song that reminds you of him or her in your playlist. Music often means more than words ever could.
Photographer: Gert Huygaerts Typical him, her, them!
Perhaps your loved one was secretly a real foodie. Or maybe his or her most precious possession was a stamp collection. Or perhaps this precious person was crazy about building model aeroplanes. These are some typical characteristics that you will never forget. Incorporate these personal characteristics subtly into your menu or decorations, for example. It's a beautiful way to keep unforgettable memories alive on your special day.
A moment of remembrance
You can also choose to plan a special moment to remember the person or people you miss so much. During your speech, you can reflect on some funny or beautiful moments you shared together. Or you can mention them or hold a minute's silence during your ceremony... Another particularly beautiful gesture – to be agreed with the local council or city and the fire brigade – is to release a wish balloon with a light or fire inside. Your light will then ascend to the heavens <3
Photo: Real Wedding: Elien en Dave - Photographer: Anneleen Jegers Q&A: Remembering loved ones who have passed away at your wedding
Q: How can I remember loved ones who have passed away without it becoming too heavy?
A: Opt for subtle gestures such as a photo in your bouquet, a candle or a song during the ceremony. This will keep the atmosphere loving and warm.
Q: How can I incorporate this into the ceremony?
A: Many couples choose to have the celebrant mention them, hold a minute's silence or play a musical tribute. This allows everyone to feel the presence of their loved ones without it becoming too formal.
Q: Are there alternative ways to create a memory?
A: Yes, consider a memorial table where guests can leave a photo or message, or symbolic flowers or details that characterise your loved one. This way, their story remains a natural part of your day.
Need more help planning your ceremony or finding the right words? These ceremony speakers are professionals who put their heart and soul into their work.
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